After School Tea Club

As a child, one of my fondest memories was having tea with my Mother after school. I would be excited to share what had happened at school that day and wanted to tell her right away. As soon as I ran into the house, I would be calling her. “Mummy, where are you? Guess what happened today? “ She would be ready to listen and I would share all the daily happenings over a cup of tea. That was the beginning of The After School Tea Club. These days I am the one getting the kettle ready and listening to my grandchildren when we are visiting with them.

I started having teatime with my 3 children and 9 grandchildren when they were very young. I am thrilled that even though some of the grandkids are now in college, we still have time for tea whenever we are together. As I have shared this concept with mothers and grandmothers around the country, most fear that since they have never had tea with their kids or grandkids when they were small, that it might be a lost cause. But, from the feedback I have received, it’s never too late. Many of the children, not just girls, but boys too, are looking forward to this unique time with Mom or Grand mom as something very special. They have even asked if friends could join them. Here are some points to consider when starting your After School Tea Club.

1. Keep it Simple
2. Keep it Short
3. Keep it Classy
4. Keep it Open

Keep it Simple:

We try to use bone china cups and saucers or mugs, pretty napkins
and a table clothe to set the tone that this is not just a “milk and cookie ‘ after school snack time. You can use cups you have. What I have found to be really special is getting each child its own cup and saucer or tea mug. Theses can be picked up at garage sales or thrift stores, or even in the discount stores, such as Marshals or Ross. Many moms have brought out the china cups and saucers from their china sets. In all the years I have been doing the After School Tea Club, we have never had a broken teacup. With the atmosphere special, the manners are usually excellent.

We usually have fruit and cookies, or scones, which can be homemade or store bought. Each family has their favorite cookie and scone recipes, and if you decide to bake them at home, have it be a weekend project. The teas we use tend to be the traditional black teas, so they can have the experience of adding milk and sugar cubes. But you might have more success with some of the fruit teas or spicy ones. I also use loose-leaf teas and brew it the proper way, so it becomes sort of a little ceremony just for us. But, teabags are perfectly acceptable.
This part of preparing should be quick and easy. If done on a daily basis, keep the tea items together in one place. I use hatbox and then never have to hunt for our tea party cups and plates.

Keep it Short: Timing is Everything

In today’s hectic lifestyle, your child’s habit may be to run into the house after school, grab a soda or a candy bar, then retreat to their rooms or the den and spend hours testing or watching TV without so much of a “Hi Mom”. You can change the tone of your families after school activities by turning your living or dining rooms into your own version of The After School Tea Club. I don’t advocate this to be a long event, just about 10 to 15 minutes. Studies show that the best time for your child to share his day is right after school. Another interesting thought is how important it is to spend time with your child. A recent study showed that 89 percent of 1.100 British children, who were interviewed for the study, said they would rather spend time with their parents than receive a material gift from them. (Hewlett Packard Study May 9, 2006) Time is everything! So don’t try to have a 2-hour sit down tea party, just a cup of tea and a few cookies, or fruit will let your child know they are important to you. By the way, let the answering machine pick up the phone calls, and no cell phones or texting allowed for this special 15 minutes.

Keep it Classy: Incorporate the Classics (Music)

I hear you…”My kids don’t like that kind of music.” We play the music very soft, in the background, but it sets the tone for the teatime. In our fast paced world, this is a unique tradition to begin. Let’s give our boys and girls the opportunity for a time of culture and also a place to share their hearts. It might be that they have never been exposed to this type of music, so try some of the light classical to begin. I like to use the cable music channels, and then they can see what is playing. Encourage them to choose the music for the next After School Tea Club. At first you might meet with reluctance, but I know from experience that they really do think this is a special time just for them.

Keep it Open: Encourage Sharing

Probably the biggest benefit of setting aside time with your child is the ability to have some sharing time with them. Have an open mind, don’t be critical and let you heart listen to what they are sharing. Be sensitive to their frustrations and joys. Some families have incorporated the teatime into a daily afternoon family ritual, while others will meet just once a week. So much of this is determined by the schedules of the families. The After School Tea Club can be a fun way to open the doors for communication with your children. During the holidays, when they are home from school, this has been a time of day that many of the kids looked forward to. I hope you will try this and not be discouraged if it takes awhile for it to be accepted. If they know that you are doing something special, just for them, I believe they will come to appreciate your time together. From the comments I have received, it is worthwhile starting this tradition in your home.

This is a precious time of day to be available. If you can’t be there when they walk in the door, encourage your child to start getting things ready for the tea club. Don’t delay; start the After School Tea Club in your home today.

To join the After School Tea Club, go to www.Time4Tea.org.
It’s Free!
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